By Robert P. Poindexter
Six somber-faced men gently placed her over the depression that would soon be hallowed ground, as the crowd approached to say their final farewells to this fair maiden. On a windswept plain of a dying town that is hardly noticed by those speeding along the nearby interstate, her son and daughter, along with grandchildren, nieces, nephews and dear friends leaned in to hear the mournful final prayers that most always accompany these events.
She was my last grandparent, and one of my favorite people. Eighty-seven years of joy and heartache have now been replaced with peaceful rest.
No crocodile tears will be shed by the Hollywood glitterati. No heads of state will demand that flags be flown at half-mast. History books won’t be written in her honor. But for those of us whose lives she impacted, any of those things would feel hollow and fall short of what she deserves.
Hardly recognizable when she wasn’t smiling or laughing, she was as beautiful the day that she slipped into eternity, as she was when she first opened her eyes in this world. Her personal accomplishments were modest by the general public’s standards, but to her family she was a champion on many levels.
I’ll likely not have a reason to visit the little rock house she and my grandfather shared for most of their lives, for absent her spirit, it is now just a collection of stone and mortar. The low fence, made from the same stone the house was built with, partially encloses a small yard. It was the perfect height to be used by a young boy with a vivid imagination as a roadway, and my toy trucks must have clocked more than a million miles on its concrete cap.
As children we couldn’t wait to get to Memaw’s house during summer vacations. And Christmas mornings were particularly special there. My fourth birthday was made more special in this house because of her, as it was my first birthday with my new family.
She found great joy in, and took particular interest in preserving memories she felt were important. And though there are boxes filled with old photographs, a letter written to her by my mother, her daughter, is one of my most prized possessions. In it, my mother gave a heartfelt account of her thoughts on adopting me into the family. The fact that this letter has survived some 43 years now, is testimony to what she put value on.
She was truly one of the ‘good guys,’ and I will miss her every day for the rest of my life.
Sleep well sweetheart, and tell Pepaw “hello” from all of us who are still just mere mortals.
So, the next time you get a little upset because an older person isn’t driving fast enough to suit you, or it takes them a little extra time at the checkout counter, give ’em a break. Most likely they are somebody’s ‘somebody special’ and have lived here long enough to deserve a little respect.
DorleeM says
Hi Rob,
This was a very touching post…Thanks so much for sharing. You’ve brought back for me memories of my beloved late grandmother who passed away 5 years ago.
She too was my last grandparent and one of my most favorite people in the world. I miss her and being able to talk to her so much.
It is so hard when you lose someone who means that much to you…I cherish with great love and fondness all my memories of my late grandmother.
May you always derive some comfort from your memories of Meemaw and the times you have spent with her,
Deepest condolences,
Dorlee
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
Thank you so much Dorlee. I wasn’t sure if this would be appropriate for a blog post, but your comment has given me some reassurance and hopefully others like yourself will pause for a moment today to smile about some sweet memory as well.
Cheers and thanks again
Rob
Rehschel says
Hey Rob,
That was…..yeah. I cant stop crying, it was touching=) I cant wait to show this to Todd when he gets home, it will make his day! Have a great day!
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
Glad you enjoyed it Rehschel. Thanks for checking in.
Cheers
Rob
Julie Walraven says
Rob, such a wonderful post! I think we can all look back at someone who changed our lives and understand the value they gave us. I grew up with my maternal Grandmother living downstairs in the duplex that my grandfather (who died way before I was born) built. She was 72 when I was born and I still remember her splitting wood for the wood stove. She taught me many German words, one I remember well was “heis” for Hot – when I got too close to the stove…
Blessings on you and Jacqui both…
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
What a sweet memory, Julie. Thank you for sharing that and thank you for the kind words.
Cheers
Rob
Ronnie Ann says
Beautiful, heartfelt post Rob. I’m sorry for your loss, but so glad you shared this with us. Thank you. Reminder of what really matters in life. Big hug from me to you and Jac!
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
You are too kind, Ronnie Ann. Thanks for the hug.
Cheers
Rob
Beverly shelton says
Oh Rob, Love this so much. Today was a bad day for me, but that’s to be expected. We’ll always have our memories. Mother
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
I am so glad you approved of it, Mom. I hope my words did justice to this very special person.
I love you very much
Rob
Miriam Salpeter, Keppie Careers says
Rob – Thanks for sharing these special memories. My condolences to you, Jacqui, and your whole family on your loss.
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
Thank you so much, Miriam. My family and I appreciate your kind words.
Cheers
Rob
Jan Barry says
Oh Rob, that was wonderful and so touching.It is so amazing to me that you are able to put your feelings into words in this way. It was a touching tribute and you are truly gifted.
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
Thank you sweetheart. What a nice surprise to see you here. You’re a great sister and a terrific person.
Love You
Rob
Barb Poole says
Such a beautiful from-the-heart post, Rob! My sympathies and prayers to you, Jacqui and your family!
My mother-in-law, Norma lived with us for 17 years and left this world about this time 3 years ago. A feisty deaf woman who raised her son alone, she taught our sons some invaluable life lessons. She also kept the cookie jar full! We were so blessed to have someone with life wisdom in our lives for so long. I can feel how much your grandmother meant to you. I would venture that she is smiling at you right now! Thanks for sharing such a wonderful tribute!
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
Thank you so much, Barb. I’m loving hearing the stories of how others were touched by their own grandparents. Memaw would be tickled that she was able to help stir these memories and be a part of it all.
Cheers
Rob
Marianna says
What a wonderful tribute to Memaw! The hole that Memaw has left in your heart will heal – the scar that remains will serves as a reminder of all the things she was to you.
I particularly like and endorse your final paragraph.
I had a Baba and Did and an Oma and Opa. This is the first I’ve heard of Memaw and Pepaw.
My heart goes out to you and your family.
ROBERT POINDEXTER says
Thank you Marianna. You are too sweet.
Cheers
Rob